Completing Your Altar


Your Spirit Altar is never truly complete. You can always continue to gather items based on new responses to past prompts, or, really, anything that connects you to  the spirit of your beloved. This altar is not static- it is dynamic. It can change and grow- items being added, some taken away, the arrangement of items shifting. 

I will ammend what I've just said. Everyone's version of grief looks different, and no one's can be judged. That said, the altar you have made is a representation of your process of grieving. You may have much activity at the start, and then over time that intensity may diminish. It may come back in at times here and there. Or it may sit unchanged for periods. This is all good and normal and fine. If it takes longer time between your visits to the altar, or you find yourself thinking less about it, please do not take that as a sign that you are forgetting your beloved. That would be impossible.  Your beloved has an eternal place within your heart which does not require tending to the altar. 

Energy may wane with the altar and that can signify a change in your grieving process. It can mean that the emotion is less intense, giving you space to focus on your own life, living it to its fullest. This altar is ultimately for you, to help you with the awful period of integrating your loss. There will come a time when the integration has happened, however that may look for you, and the need for the interface to your beloved feels less necessary. 

If the time comes that you become aware that you are paying less attention to the altar, please do not despair. Your beloved is always with you, as an aspect of your own spirit. Come back to the altar at times that are special for your beloved and you- birthdays, anniversaries and so forth. Or perhaps you say a quick 'goodbye' and 'hello' when you leave and come home for the day.

My ultimate point is this: you are doing this program because you are in pain. This pain is a reflection of the love you felt. That love is not affected by the altar and what may happen to it. The love is not affected by how much you think about your lost one as you continue with your life.

The purpose of this program is to help you get back into your own life, to live it fully with heart open. As that happens the need for the altar may wane. Again, this is not a reflection of your love. Your love is not diminishing. It is that you have integrated your loss and are ready to be more within your own life, which your beloved would want for you.

And, for when the need arises, your altar will be there assisting you to tap back into the spirit of your beloved.

Okay, one last step before beginning.


A final check-in before beginning